One of Those

Alan Cadman

Sparkling spring water

 

‘I hope you’re not one of those vegetarians, Rob.’

            ‘I didn’t say I was. I’m just reading the menu, happen to have reached that page. What do you mean by one of those vegetarians?’

            ‘Well it’s not normal, we’re carnivores. Our teeth are designed to eat meat.’

            ‘Gemma, I’ve never noticed that yours resemble those of a lion, tiger, or wolf. Our first working lunch together isn’t going down very well, is it?’

            ‘Anyway, where do they get their—’

            ‘Oh that old chestnut, “where do they get their protein from?” Google it.’

            ‘Are you a vegetarian?’

            ‘No, I’m vegan.’