by Aqsa Mustafa
Xocolatl (Aztec Chocolate)
The
horse came back alone.
In
the swirling snow I saw its dark shape materialize through the trees, a sad
figure with its head bent and feet dragging, and when I searched for the one
that should’ve been clinging to its reins, it was only to watch said reins
tangle, empty, with the horse’s legs.
He
didn’t return.
I
rushed forward, pulled the shaking animal inside, and shut the door. Letting its
frozen snout settle against my neck, I stood still, head to his forehead, almost
as if trying to pull from the freezing animal the story of what’d happened to
the man I waited for. But there was no reply, and I left, disappointed.
The
next night, I was at the door again, looking out, hoping against hope. The air
was crisp, clear, sharp like a knife, clear of white sugar. In the resultant
dark canvass, I squinted my eye for a glimpse of something darker, the shape of
someone coming home from a trip that took too long, a wrong turn in the road
finally made right. But the night remained of one depth, and he didn’t not
return.
Grass
now poked its face through breaks in the worn cobbles. Sometimes I heard birds
in the trees overhead, hushed, isolated voices raising furtive tunes, as if
fearing the sky would hear and disapprove.
But
the cold was loosening its hold and the world getting bolder. Leaves shone green
again, a spark of life and vibrant color, and I watched the flowers bloom in
wild bushes, thinks of dreams fulfilled in spring.
Yet
he wouldn’t return.
Rains
lashed the ground and collected in falsely deep pools. Pitter-patter went the
rain drops on the fast-shut windows. Rivulets ran down the inner wall and onto
the tips of my shoes.
I
stand with my face pressed to the cold glass, looking at a world drowning from
inside a glass globe, unheeding of the wetness now spreading under my feet, and
watched for a sodden figure to emerge from the trees. No puddle splashes, no
dripping branches shake.
He
doesn’t return.
The
chickens are agitated; they smell the snow in the air yet to come. I cluck to
them with my hands of my hips, fancying that they understood, my only companions
of conversation that they were. I push hair off my forehead and look toward that
path in the woods, that path that my eyes sought of their own accord. A wishful
reverie lay on its beaten dirt, I the dreamer.
Shaking
my head, I turn to go back inside.
Leaves
rustle and a twig snaps.
“Beccy?”
About the author
Aqsa
Mustafa is a Pakistani storyteller who finds it easier to talk to blank papers
and computer screens than people. She aims at bringing all the mermaids and
boggarts living in her
head
to life so that other children might play with them and realize that dreams
don’t necessarily have to be forgotten in the morning. She’s always willing to
hear from you. Talk to her on her twitter handle @AqsaMustafa and be a friend.
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