Introduction
Begin with the big bang and end with a distant trumpet call; understand how to send a cheese sandwich into the future, have the origin of the universe explained and find out how to achieve immortality, and finally add in a splash of espionage, enjoy the mix.
In the Beginning
The Celestial Offices were in uproar; clerks, angels, and demons were running hither and thither, carrying sheaves of paper, instructions, and bulky files. The Celestial Board had decided on a Creation Program and the countdown to the Big Bang had started.
The black matter engineers rigged up the lighting sources; unfortunately some were highly unstable and quite a few exploded, sending an awful lot of debris out into the void.
“OK, OK,” said the senior celestial engineer, “let them cool for a while but at least we’ve now got light that we can work by.”
The scattered debris started to shine out there in the void.
“Well,” said the celestial engineers “they were part of our office lighting sources – let them be; I’m sure they won’t have an effect on our Creation Program – will they?”
In the celestial offices the lights began to flicker off, then on, and off and on again, with a monotonous regularity.
“Not doing any harm is it?” said the Senior Celestial Engineer. “It’s quite pretty really, so if we can’t fix it let’s leave it – we can call it a ‘Day/Night Program’ – how about that?”
The Celestial Board weren’t that happy, but agreed to monitor the situation.
“Let’s address all that debris flying around in the void, so what are we going to do about all those rocks and fire globes banging into each other. Some of them are exploding, others are just hanging around,” said the Chairman of the Celestial Board.
“Leave them be,” said the Celestial and Black Matter Engineers. “We’ll sort it, don’t worry.”
“We’ll just throw some Dark Energy into the void; that’ll calm it down.”
So here they were three days into the program and the Big Bang hadn’t even started. They had flickering lights and debris, and now the Black Matter Engineers were pumping Dark Energy and a splash of Dark Matter into the void.
The Celestial Board met for an emergency meeting, “not going too well is it,” said the Chairman, as the various board members nodded their agreement.
“So when do we fire up the Big Bang?” asked the Chairman.
“Not just yet,” said the Senior Celestial Engineer, “let things cool down and in a day or so we’ll send out a couple of observers to review the situation, report back and we’ll see if we can get back on track.”
The committee met again the following day; well the lights had flickered on/off and on again, and the Celestial Observers now reported back.
“It’s all chaos out there,” they reported.
“All this dark energy and matter has allowed the debris to expand outwards into the void. Some of the matter is cooling down, and they’re forming into what looks like solar masses, and rocky planets that are now spinning on their own axes. You can all see this on the ‘Giant-Omniversal-Display’,” indicating the current view of the universe on the massive screen behind the Celestial Chairman.
“Right,” said the Chairman, “do we pull the plug on the Big Bang and start over?”
“Not just yet,” said the Senior Celestial Engineer, “we could throw some normal matter into the mix and see what happens.”
“Ok do that,” said the Chairman, “but I’m setting up a Genesis subcommittee to monitor all this; you can report directly to them.”
“Righto,” replied the engineer, “I’ll be sending out the observers again. They’ll report back to me and the Genesis committee.”
They were now into day five of their somewhat skewed Creation Programme, the Celestial Observers now reported to the Genesis Committee that on some of the spinning rocks various forms of Organic life were beginning to appear. The Genesis Committee escalated this up to the Celestial Board who now declared a Celestial Emergency.
The infinity-sized room was packed with Celestial Board Members, the Genesis Committee, Celestial Engineers and Observers plus the Host of Angels and the Legions of Demons.
“Right,” said the Chairman, “where are we with this?”
“It looks like we have a runaway Autonomous Creation Programme,” replied the Senior Celestial Engineer. “As you can see on the ‘Giant-Omniversal-Display’.”
“That’s disappointing, how do we stop it?” said the Chairman as he turned to face the Giant-Omniversal-Display.
The G.O.D. suddenly displayed across its screen, “LET THERE BE LIGHT,” and counted down from ten, and at zero, there was silence and the Big Bang happened.
About the author
Henry is a retired surgeon having worked for the NHS for over thirty-five years. He has in the past written and published a number of clinical and scientific papers, but began writing for fun following his retiral from Clinical Practice. Henry mainly writes on a whole variety of topics: tales from the Confused Beginning of the Universe, the modern day involvement of the Olympian Gods in London life, and a number of wartime short spy stories. He has published a number of these stories on the CaféLit site and some have been included in The Best of CaféLit, and Aftermath published by Chapeltown Books. He writes a monthly ‘Old Fogies’ column for The Edge a monthly magazine published in Chelmsford and is a long term and avid supporter of Tottenham Hotspur.
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